This little tale starts with some background.

Last week I wrote a post on how tipping is an art form.  On Saturday night I was up way to late… then on Sunday morning I woke up way to early…. 4 hours of sleep… 6 hours at church… 2 hour nap.

So, after I wake up from my nap it’s about 5:30 – 6:00 my wife decides she and the girls would like to go out for dinner.  So we go to Ruby Tuesdays.  They have great Burgers and an even better salad bar.  We order our food and head up to the salad bar. 

My wife and I enjoy our salad and for a minute we fool ourselves into thinking this is the start of us eating healthy and shedding the last few “winter pounds” so we can fit into our spedo’s and bikinis.  (Go ahead try and get the image of me in a banana hammock out of your head!)

we are almost done with our salad when I see our food coming from the kitchen.  One guys is carrying the food and our waitress is carrying our drink refills.  the guy is setting the food out in front of us and the waitress places the drinks down.  Everything looks good and smells good.  then with no warning I am cold and wet.

At the same time as if ordained by a higher power my drink and food collide.  My drink took the brunt of the force and ended all over my lap.  I grab the only napkin on the table and start fumbling for the ice that is slowly freezing my butt. 

The waitress say “oh my … I am so sorry!”

The guy says “she snuck the cup int here… I didn’t see it… oh man…” 

My response “no problem… this happens to me all the time.”  I have seriously had 3 drinks spilled on me in one meal before, and not in the cool soap opera way where I get to say something incredibly rude and instead of slapping me I get a glass of scotch thrown in my face.  Nope just the simple “please pass the … oh shoot… oops… I’m sorry!”

So as my wallet and right butt cheek are soaking up the iced tea and there are seriously no napkins insight my waitress asks the other guy to go get me… “a new iced tea.”  I quickly asked for more napkins “as long as he was going that way.”

After patting down the booth seat and making an attempt at drying my shorts she tells me “there is still a lot of ice back there.  but it’s probably not appropriate for me to reach in there and get it.”  I started laughing.

So here I am soaking wet on the right side.  My wife half laughing half feeling bad for me.  My 3 year old repeatedly asking me what happened, and why she did that to me.  My 5 year old eating her meal.  And two members of the waitstaff apologizing at me from across the room.  I assume they were apologizing.  They were doing that thing when you mouth the words and hope the other guy doesn’t “hear” “Hi Molly.”

I enjoyed the rest of my meal and they even gave me a free desert. 

I could launch in to a mini sermon about how I didn’t loose my temper or how i showed real love to these people, but really there is no point to this post other than a funny story.

oh yeah I left an appropriate tip… What would you have left?

Later, Billy